Why do I never feel ‘good enough’?

Author

Wellbeing Team

17 May, 2026
Why do I never feel ‘good enough’?

We all know that feeling of being pulled in every direction and never being quite good enough – but does it really have to be this way? Liz discusses why so many women feel inadequate in midlife, and looks at ways to shift our priorities and quieten our inner critic with a little self-compassion.

Plus: the impact of late-night scrolling on your sleep, postpartum supplements, how sparkling water affects your teeth, and is it ever too late to start taking collagen?

Stream the episode below, or download the recording via Apple Podcasts or Spotify.

The midlife mental load (and 5 ways to let go of perfection)

For many women in midlife, life can feel like a relentless balancing act — juggling career, relationships, children, ageing parents, friendships and personal health, all while trying to appear capable and in control. Add social media into the mix – with its polished lifestyles and ‘having-it-all’ messaging – and it’s no wonder many of us are left feeling inadequate.

But perhaps the issue isn’t that we’re failing, notes Liz, but that we’re trying to meet unrealistic expectations across too many areas of life simultaneously. Trying to give equal attention to every area of life at all times is exhausting – and unsustainable.

Instead, it can help to think of life in seasons. At certain times, work may demand more energy. At others, health, family or wellbeing need to take priority. “What we need to do is focus on what matters most in the current season of life that we’re in,” explains Liz, who shares five ways to help ease feelings of inadequacy.

Choose your top priorities

Ask yourself: what are the three things that genuinely matter most at this point in my life? When you’re clear on your priorities, it becomes easier to let go of non-essential pressures and say no without guilt.

Simplify where you can

Modern life is unnecessarily complicated, says Liz. She recommends streamlining routines, reducing commitments or lowering expectations, even in small ways, to create valuable mental space and reduce overwhelm.

Protect your wellbeing

Rest and self-care aren’t indulgences – they’re essential for emotional regulation and resilience. When we’re depleted, we’re more likely to feel negative. “Sleep is a fundamental pillar for how we feel about ourselves and our ability to cope,” she explains.

Speak to yourself like a friend

We can be incredibly compassionate towards others, yet deeply critical of ourselves. Notice your inner dialogue, says Liz. How would you speak to a friend who felt they weren’t enough? Showing yourself the same kindness can have a powerful effect on self-worth.

It also helps to recognise, she points out, that feeling like you’re not doing enough is often a sign that you care deeply, not that you’re failing. Midlife women often carry an enormous load – notice what you are already achieving, rather than focusing on what you’re not.

Embrace ‘good enough’

Perfectionism is one of the biggest drivers of inadequacy. In reality, doing things reasonably well – and consistently – is often healthier, and far more sustainable, than trying to do everything ‘just so’.

“Nobody does everything perfectly all the time,” says Liz. And in midlife, learning to accept that ‘good enough’ truly is enough may be one of the most freeing lessons of all.

Also in this episode:

  • Does looking at my phone at night affect my sleep?
  • How to cope when you don’t feel good enough
  • What sparkling water is doing to your teeth
  • Supplements for postpartum health
  • Have I left it too late to start taking collagen?

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